Opinionated? Me?: June 2011

contact/review policy

Alright, I'm not a rules kinda gal. But I do, believe it or not, have some sort of policy on review request and offers. First off, my prefered genre's generally fall under every category but Romance and the real fluffy kind of Chick Lit (i.e. if the summary has the word 'sassy' or 'independent' anywhere in it, consider it blacklisted). Other then that, it's all far game. If it is a review copy, I will more then likely read and review it in a timely matter, though please keep in mind I'm a student and need to maintain some sort of social life (less people worry...). If you'd like to contact me, my email is:

danielleeloko78@aol.com.

I do check my email daily, so chances are I will get back to you sometime in the afternoon. I maintain right as a reviewer not to review a novel because a) I found it so disturbingly bad I think it best to save the author some face or b) I have fallen ill with some kind of Malarian disease and simply cannot move my wee little fingers.

Thursday, June 30, 2011

on idiot parents with internet access

Posted by D Swizzle at 4:29 AM

first of all, i am well aware that i have not posted anything in a long time, and i could give you an excuse but, let's face it, you don't fucking care. second of all, i am equally well aware that each and every one of you are entitled to your opinions, just as i am to mine. however.

there's this article. it's kind of dumb. okay, it's really dumb. and i just can't even begin to point out every flawed argument in it. so i will just zero in on one, which also happens to be the one that is driving me fucking insane.

this woman, this miz gurdon, wrote at length her disappointment with the YA world, explaining how the content is irresponsible and damaging, how the publishers are only looking out to move papers and the authors are looking to shock (at least, that's how i read it). she wrote how i, a young girl of sixteen, could read something like Scars by Cheryl Rainfield and suddenly get the idea to slice up my arms in a self mutilating fashion. but wait, that is not the focus of the article--no, if it were about the welfare of us children, i would hardly be taking the time to blabber on about it. no no, what tickles MY pissy bones is that this miz gurdon is not so much concerned for the children as she is the parents of these children. she wants to know why adults can't be comfortable with the books their teens are reading. she wants to know why parents aren't given more control over what is published and marketed to their youngsters. she wants to know why she, as a mother, can't decide what words her daughter can allow to soil her precious little mind. well, miz gurdon, i have a pretty easy answer:

the book is not for you.

young adult novels are not written for a young adults parents; they are not written to please and pacify. they are written to verify something no one else thinks is real; they are written to immortalize a day and age, a lifestyle. they are written to make some lonely kid out there feel like they're not completely alone in the world. they are written for the most vulnerable people out there. which is not you, miz gurdon. so get you self righteous ass of that poor high horse you're sitting on and take care of your own kids instead of worrying about everyone else's. kthanks.

Ratings...

1: Horrible. Revolting. My eyes are bleeding. Stop it. Now.

2: Bitch, please.

3: Few redeeming qualities, but they're there. No bleeding.

4: Pretty bad, but it's got something about it. Bleeding from paper cuts associated with lingering over pages wondering how something can be so cringe inducing.

5: Eh.

6: Very good.

7: Excellent. No bleeding.

8: Fantastic. Simply wonderful. I laughed, I cried. I did not bleed.

9: Sonuvabitch, so close to ten

10: Orgasmic. Bleeding from thrashing head over things as self-punishment for not discovering this item earlier in life. Everything pales in comparison.